Last week was rough for me.  Some of you noticed.  Generally in life, I pride myself in being a pretty even-keeled individual.  High lows and low highs . . . riding out the waves of life.  Last week didn’t work that way.

For the first time in a while, my faith was a struggle.  And let me clarify that in contrast to “struggling with my faith”.  I had no doubt as to my faith in Jesus Christ, nor his saving grace for me.  In contrast, I was struggling more with my place in that faith, and how I was supposed to be acting out the “living sacrifice” to God.  Everything felt like a painful sacrifice, with no fulfillment, no reward, and I allowed my selfish self to begin to ask what the purpose was behind anything I was doing in Jesus name.  Following right behind that came guilt at such a thought, then anger at myself, and then, even some anger at God . . . because He started it all by loving me and choosing me.

I searched the Bible for someone feeling the way I was.  Certainly Paul was no consolation . . . certainly suffering more than me and having a better attitude about it.  That felt like “Why can’t you be more like your brother?”  So I searched on, and landed in Lamentations.  Finally, someone woeful.  Someone angry.  And yet someone with faith.  For those that don’t know it, the theme to Lamentations (besides lamenting obviously) is that God will restore.  It took me a little bit to grasp it and to set my own frustrations aside.  God will restore . . . me.

I’m still working through stuff.  We all are.  Some of it has to do with how we’re serving.  Most of it has to do with letting God be our strength and our even keel.  I had faith that God had saved me.  I had to be reminded that he would do it again.  Thank God, He Restores.

As I was sitting at the appreciation dinner listening to everyone give their thanks to various people, I felt compelled to do the same, but just couldn’t put the words together quite like I wanted to.  So I have relegated myself back to the written word and the blog to get it done.

My thank you is to everyone at LifeBridge.  And it is a thank you for transparency.  We live in a world where it is very important to maintain one’s image as competent, in control, and everything other than in need of someone or something to give us life.  What I’ve found is that LifeBridge is very much the opposite.  People here allow their struggles to be a part of their discussions, their fellowship, and it is an amazing testimony.  Every time that someone struggles with something publicly within LifeBridge, it builds that community feeling, but more importantly, lets us rejoice and cry together.  I can’t count the times that I’ve been rejuvenated by a story or a struggle recounted where God is seen quite obviously at work.  It is the perfect recharge to my drained soul every week.

Maybe everyone isn’t as trasparent as I am feeling they are, but it’s certainly enough to give me that appreciation for the “family of God” and the support it can give.  I for one will strive to be a little more open with my own struggles and stories at LifeBridge.  Because perhaps I can provide the same powerful energizing sense of community that I’ve been enjoying from others.  Perhaps you can too. – Jon

Ed reminded us today that we need to sort through the whole tension of needs vs. wants. Tonight we had a good chance to put that tension to the test as we arrived home after a full day out and about with LifeBridge friends. When we pulled into our drive way we noticed that the bikes on our front porch were knocked over. On closer inspection, we discovered that Brett & Lindsay’s bikes were both stolen. It was the one time we had neglected to lock them up – figures. Needless to say our kids were very disappointed. However, it provided a good opportunity to reflect on needs vs. wants and to realize that even though we may not have the bikes we “wanted”, God is still faithful to meet our needs. The plus side of things is that we have been slow in discarding of their old bikes that are a little too small for them – and they still have those bikes to last them out the Fall. Though it may be a little disappointing, it provided an opportunity for us to pray as a family thanking God that he provides everything we have and also to pray for those who stole the bikes. These are people who are headed in a life direction that will bring them much sorrow – they need God more than we need bikes.

So now our kids are handling things extremely well. I hope that we have modelled for them a lack of anger, grace, and a trust in God to watch over us. Bikes may be someting we want, but not something we need. God is our source of joy – not things. So we continue on joyfully. Joy no matter what!

Thanks Ed for the reminder this morning.

Rob

I know for me, and possibly for you too, Sunday mornings at LifeBridge is often the closest I feel to God every week.  Certainly when comparing work or daily chores to the opportunity to get together and celebrate God, that makes sense.  Hearing the testimony of others, or just simply being in the presence of other Christians is such a boost, but as I was reminded this weekend, there are other ways and places to meet God and feel His presence. 

April and I missed last week at LifeBridge, probably much like a lot of others, as we took advantage of the long weekend to head up to Cape Breton for our first look at the Cabot Trail.   And believe me when I say that we saw the handiwork of the greatest artist of all time.  The leaves were changing on the hills, and to say that God has a knack for colors and beauty may be the ultimate understatement.  It was incredible.  I could not fathom how anybody could look at that . . . and question the existence of a creator . . . of The Creator.  I don’t have the words to describe it properly, nor a picture that does it justice.

The evidence of God is all around us.  Sometimes it has to be so absolutely strikingly beautiful for us to take notice, but it’s there.  And when you notice it, and give thanks for it, He’s right there to enjoy it with you.  There are times in my life when things are rough, that I question God.  There are times when my faith is faltering that I question the existence of God.  And there are times when I know that the existence of God, and of His presence in my life is unquestionable.  I thank Him for those ones.